Now, don’t go be asking your mama if she used Coca-Cola in her nether regions! And then she will get all hussy on you, and letting you know how you should be so lucky that Coke was expensive back in Cuba when she was a little girl and that if she would have known both you and your siblings would not be here and then she would have had a career and get to travel all over the world and then she would be able to tell your father to kiss her ass and get out of her house and run to Miami every winter and drink Mojitos under the afternoon sun.

Not that this happened to me.

It is just a for instance.

Did you know that back in the 1950s and 1960s, women would use Coca-Cola as birth control? Apparently, they would make Coca-Cola douches. After sex, a woman would get up from her bed, go into the bathroom, take a bottle of Coke and shake it with all of her might and let it rip inside of her.

I assume over the toilet or in the bathtub.

But, can you imagine!

Apparently, the acidity of Coca-Cola killed sperm and the classic coke bottle provided a convenient “shake and shoot” applicator. And since birth control was taboo and was usually only given to married women, you could see how this would be cost effective.

I am not going to lie. I KNOW that my ass would have probably used this if I found myself in a predicament back then.

For sure!

Could give us a new angle in the Pepsi Challenge?

Please note: Sperm have a remarkable resilience and can remain alive for hours.

Also note: The force of introducing any douche can push the sperm even closer to the uterus than they were before.

Lastly: Coca-Cola is said to tenderize steaks and remove corrosion from car bumpers.

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