Aleka Are You Going To Get Circumcised #4
From Lucresia’s hospital bed as dictated to Ava Linton-Byron:
“Is this it? I thought I only dropped off one small bag?” asked my brother.
“You did. Those where all my essentials-my make-up, my Nick Lacheys, my eyelash curler, my Vogue. But, then Aunt Lorraine came with a bag of things I forgot; then Ava, Jim and Stupida dropped a few things off,” I replied non-chalantly.
“Are you sure you are going to be okay? I think that you are leaving way too early,” said my brother.
“Do you think they will miss the towels? How about these wash cloths?” I asked. “ Don’t you know they need the beds. That’s how they do. They have people dying in the waiting rooms. Remember what they did to Uncle Sonny?” I added.
“Don’t remind me. I hate being here! You know what? Make sure you take the soaps! Is that mirror glued to the table?”asks my brother as he looked underneath the table.
“Wait, I need to grab some plastic gloves,” I said.
“Eww. For what?” asked my brother.
“To perm and colour my hair at home, ya dink!”
A nurse wheels my neighbor on a gurney into the room.
“Well, if it isn’t my favorite bud. How’s it going? Did everything work out for you?” I asked.
“Yes, dear. Are you leaving?” he asked as the nurse helped him up on the bed.
“Yeah they are kicking me out! Oh, where’s my manners, have you met my brother, Aleka?” I asked.
“No, no I haven’t,” replied my neighbour.
“You and Aleka have nothing in common,” I said, as my brother reached out to shake his hand.
“I thought you said you come from a line of Jews?” he asked puzzled.
“We do, but he ain’t circumcised,” I said.
“No?” he asked startled.
“Nope. My mother did not think that he was one of the chosen ones. And I agree with her.”![]()
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Heartbroken, Lucresia Linton decided to turn to the internet. She believes that if God gives you lemons, then you must order your very rude child to make you a pitcher of lemonade and go find an audience elsewhere!



