My Father’s Birthday Present-Cow’s Tongue and Pig’s Feet

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Jan

My Father’s Birthday Present-Cow’s Tongue and Pig’s Feet

My father’s birthday is next week, what to do, what to do.

He is a simple man, my father is. He is a full red-blooded male. He loves to go fishing. He loves to watch his wrestling and his nature shows. He loves to go out and sit on his back porch and go bird watching.

I remember one time I made him a gorgeous (my word) bird house. I was in the 7^th grade and I was taking Shop. I decided why not make full use of my time and make something for my father’s birthday. I cut all the pieces, by myself, and put it all together, by myself. And I even sanded it down all by myself, too. I got an A++ on it.
I remember my father’s eyes when he opened up the package. He had an almost quizzically look on him. I knew he must know what it was, I mean it did look like a bird house! I was never those type of children who made a mug and it didn’t look like a mug. I never deluded myself. I was that grown. So, you must understand that when I say to you my father had a weird look, he had a weird look.

He began to chuckle and then the chuckling turned into full out guffawing! I asked him what was so funny? He asked me if I made the bird house with African birds in mind, because those are the only type of birds that were going to fit into the hole.

Yes, my father IS that country!

I hadn’t realized that the hole was so small. Looking back on it now, you could see that I had a thing for small tight holes. Ha!

But, I digress.

I have even resorted to looking at the local supermarket for gifts. I thought maybe coffee beans, but then I know that he would prefer the ones from the Blue Mountain in Jamaica, and honey, I ain’t gonna track up that far to get that! And then I ventured down the meat section, contemplating between cow’s tongue and pig’s feet, so that he could barbecue. But, alas, it IS winter after all. So, that won’t do. I did find the perfect gift for my mother, which I bought promptly because it is on sale-toilet paper.