Howard the Duck-Happy Birthday Mom!
“Dad! What’s wrong?”
Possums, I found my dad crying with his head in his hands.
Today is my mother’s birthday.
“It’s your mother,” said my dad turning to me with tears in his eyes.
The only time I saw my dad cry was when my he lost his father, mother and his two brothers.
He still has one left.
I don’t think he will cry for this one though.
They hate each other.
“What’s wrong? Is she okay?” I asked him.
“Yes. She is fine,” he replied.
“Aww…you are crying because it is her birthday?” I asked him as I balanced myself beside him on the back po
rch.
“No,” he answered.
“Aww…you are crying because it is her birthday and you are thinking about all the years you spent together?” I asked.
“No,” he answered.
“Aww…you are crying because it is her birthday and you don’t know what to get her?” I asked.
“No,” he answered.
“Aww…you are crying because it is her birthday and you love her?” I asked.
“No,” he answered.
“Then what is it Dad? Why are you crying?” I asked.
“Cause she made me put back the duck!” he answered as he started to cry all over again.
“What duck?” I asked him.
“The duck that I found when I went fishing!”he cried.
Possums, sometimes in life God gives you those keen moments in your journey where all you can say to yourself is “what de ass????”
“First she made me give up my dog…” he started.
“Which you found in a box when you went fishing!” I finished.
“Then the turtles…” he started.
“Which you foundoff a river bank when you went fishing!”
“Then the swan…” he started.
“Which you found on the side of the road when you went fishing!”
“And now the duck! She never let’s me do anything fun! She doesn’t like me going fishing!” he complained.
“Maybe that is why she don’t like you to go fishing! You keep bringing things home!”
Possums, it is my mother’s birthday today, the duck is back at the pond and my father is a broken man.
So, Mom-Happy Birthday, I love you!
Dad-You will never ever get to do what you want! That is what marriage is all about!
And so long Howard the duck!
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Heartbroken, Lucresia Linton decided to turn to the internet. She believes that if God gives you lemons, then you must order your very rude child to make you a pitcher of lemonade and go find an audience elsewhere!
