Think about this Possums,  the constant eye for detail of the pulling back the skin of the penis, not to say that I vision my brother doing this, but I have seen this done before, being the worldly woman that I am! And don’t forget about the constant stroking until the tootsie comes out of its roll! So, it is no wonder why he is so good!

So, possums, moral of the story is a you don’t have to cut open a sausage before it goes into the frying pan, the heat alone will pull off its skin!

p.s. I left a message with my father to ask my brother when he got home… And yes, he still hasn’t got circumcised. And my father would like to add, neither did he!

From Lucresia’s hospital bed as dictated to Ava Linton-Byron:

“Is this it? I thought I only dropped off one small bag?” asked my brother.

“You did. Those where all my essentials-my make-up, my Nick Lacheys, my eyelash curler, my Vogue. But, then Aunt Lorraine came with a bag of things I forgot; then Ava, Jim and Stupida dropped a few things off,” I replied non-chalantly.

“Are you sure you are going to be okay? I think that you are leaving way too early,” said my brother.

“Do you think they will miss the towels? How about these wash cloths?” I asked. “ Don’t you know they need the beds. That’s how they do. They have people dying in the waiting rooms. Remember what they did to Uncle Sonny?” I added.

“Don’t remind me. I hate being here! You know what? Make sure you take the soaps! Is that mirror glued to the table?”asks my brother as he looked underneath the table.

“Wait, I need to grab some plastic gloves,” I said.

“Eww. For what?” asked my brother.

“To perm and colour my hair at home, ya dink!”

A nurse wheels my neighbor on a gurney into the room.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite bud.  How’s it going? Did everything work out for you?” I asked.

“Yes, dear. Are you leaving?” he asked as the nurse helped him up on the bed.

“Yeah they are kicking me out! Oh, where’s my manners, have you met my brother, Aleka?” I asked.

“No, no I haven’t,” replied my neighbour.

“You and Aleka have nothing in common,” I said, as my brother reached out to shake his hand.

“I thought you said you come from a line of Jews?” he asked puzzled.

“We do, but he ain’t circumcised,” I said.

“No?” he asked startled.

“Nope. My mother did not think that he was one of the chosen ones. And I agree with her.”

From Lucresia’s hospital bed as dictated to Ava Linton-Byron:

“So, did you bring the stuff?”

“Yeah, I got the stuff,” answered my brother.

“Did anyone see you carry it in?” I questioned.

“No, I kept it hidden under my jacket. You know that you owe me big time for this. I could have gotten in trouble with the hospital authorities if I got caught with the stuff!” he said.

“Listen, I have done without it for a long time and what they got in here is no where near what they have on the outside. I need my fix and I need it now!” I replied.

“Okay. Well, here it is,” he said while closing the door. “I hope this does for you whatever it suppose to do,” whispered my brother.

He opened his jacket and handed over a Fillet-0 fish with fries and an baked apple pie.

“Ohhhh! This is soo good!!!” I said biting into the thing. “You are a good man, Charlie Brown! A good man! By the way, are you still not circumcised?”

“Yes!!! Why do you keep asking me that?” he yelled.

“You know that I can push this very button and a nurse will come in wielding a very heavy knife. You can just hop over there to the bed, while the other patient is gone and WALLOP! All done!” I said laughing.

“Oh, how convenient…but NO!!” said my brother.

Can’t say that I didn’t try do my part in conserving the use of our health care system.

“Ha, ha, Lathaniel has to stay on top of your shoulders! Lathaniel has to stay on top of your shoulders! And I am going to eat his pancakes!” I shouted.

“Must you tease him!!” said my brother.

“But, of course!”

“So, Aleka, are you still uncircumcised?”

“Yes.”

“What’s cum-sized?”

“It is cir-cum-cised.”

“You see why I try to keep the family from being around my children!”

“Cumsized! Cumsized! Cumsized! Cumsized!” chanted Lathaniel.

“You see La La,” opening up the fridge to take out a hot dog. “the doctor takes your willie and chops it off the front part.”

(Insert deafening silence here…so silent you can here the butter sizzle in the frying pan)

I slowly turned around. I was taken aback. I have never seen a person’s face, let alone a child’s face, look this horrified since, my family found out that they CAN test your urine for ganga!

“Why, do you have to do that?” yelled my brother.

“Oh, snap, you are right. I should use the cocktail wieners. It would have been more life like. Better yet Lathaniel, Auntie will cut this hot-dog again in half,” I said as I chopped the hot dog into two.

(Silence all around. Peppered with my laughing)

“You better eat that weiner,” said my brother looking perturbed.

“Oh, honey,” I replied. “I always do!”

Suddup!

And two, I thought of my only baby brother, who fortunately knows why he is good at pulling back a banana peel cause he does this all the time. For, at least I think he is still has the wrapper on the johnny.

For the sake of this all posts I will call him by his pet name I used to use when he was young-Aleka.

He must still be circumcised cause my mother would have told EVERYONE and their postmen about it!

I am calling my brother, Aleka, and ask if he is and will he ever get circumcised.

(The phone is ringing right now)

“Yell-ow,” (yes, this *sigh* is how he answers the phone, all day every day, even on Sundays!).

“Hi, it’s me. I wanted to know if you were still circumsized?”

“Yes…um why?

“No reason. I am not going to write or tell anyone about it or anything.”

“You write? Where? Online? What is your website?”

“I don’t have a website. So, are you going to get circumsized?”

“No.”

“Does it bother any girls you have been with.”

“No, not to my knowledge.”

“Um, I might ask you this from time to time. Okay?”

“Oo-o-o-kay.”

“So, you are sure you are not circumcised?”

“Nope.”

“You are not going to get circumcised?

“Nope.”

“Okay. Later”

(Click. Ring tone.)

And there you have it, possums. Post no.1 of  Aleka Are You Going To Get Circumcised Post.

As I probe in deeper, I will keep you posted.